I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
