i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
