I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
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