She said her name was "party"
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
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