real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
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