He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
