Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
you inspire me to be a worse person
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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