If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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