Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
