He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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