i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
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