bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
Even my vagina gasped.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
What drink are we having for lunch?
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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