If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
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