Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize