Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
