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• (818): View more from California

  Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"

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• (973): View more from New Jersey

  I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.

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• (386): View more from Florida

  he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"

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  These 23 People Had Coworkers From Hell

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met

  (1-319): View more from Iowa

  thanks it was an honor just to be nominated

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• (806): View more from Texas

  If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut

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• (425): View more from Washington

  Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.

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• (559): View more from California

  Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.

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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...

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  21 NSFW Facts About Famous Celebrities That Will Blow Your Mind

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• (615): View more from Tennessee

  Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.

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• (786): View more from Florida

  I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.

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• (585): View more from New York

  Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.

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• (407): View more from Florida

  He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him

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