i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.