Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
