Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just woke up and checked my e-mail, and apparently while drunk I bought a blowtorch. Thought you'd want to know.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
