just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
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