We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
