is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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