would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
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