Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Randomize