yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize