Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize