please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
