I heard we made out
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Randomize
