Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Randomize
