just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
