How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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