Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Randomize
