remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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