"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
we superglued breast forms to his chest. those aren't coming off anytime soon.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
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