I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
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