we made out on top of his cat.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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