So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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