and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize
