what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
