that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Randomize
