Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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