it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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