If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
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She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
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i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
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