All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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