I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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