Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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