BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
