So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
2 rounds of irish car bombs have already been taken to your 5 year sober anniversary
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize