return my video game
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I have aggressive nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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