Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
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