i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
You can't just leave with hair like that
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
