Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
